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10 thoughts on “I Am Not A Serial Killer

  1. says:

    What if a serial killerdoesn t want to become a murderer John Wayne Cleaver knows he has all the hallmarks of a serial killer.He likes to stalk people, hurt animals and fantasizes about killing friends and family Fear is a it s a weird thing, when you think about it People are only afraid of other things, they re never afraid of themselves John is afraid of himself or at least he s afraid of what he could become So, he s created a set of rules avoid any situation or thought that could encourage those traits If he notices himself following someone, he will not look at them for a week If he wants to hurt someone, he has to say something nice He has rules to help him cope and manages quite well ish to pass for a normal kid.Yet, if another serial killer comes to townwhat would be safer Following his rules or allowing himself to indulge his killer tendencies and hunt down a murderer And to top it all, there s a cute girl at school and his mom is trying to hook them up He doesn t know what s worse, that it s his mom whose facilitating this girl s interaction with a potential serial killer or the fact that he likes her back.There is a fabulous twist that brings the term serial killer into a whole new light.I love how John is doing his absolute best to curb all killer instincts AND he has a great family to support him This is a crazy good mixture of familial love and homicidal urges wrapped up in one book.One of my favorites Blog Instagram Twitter


  2. says:

    My reaction when a third of the way through the book IT happened was something like For those of you that have read the book, you know EXACTLY what I am talking about For everyone else, let me explain as best I can without any spoilers Our story begins in a small town with a wonderful introduction to John Wayne Cleaver John is 15 years old boy who is obsessed with serial killers This obsession is the result of he himself having many of the traits and characteristics of a serial killer and struggling desperately against his inner urges John has decided that by learning how these people act and what drives them, he can determine what actions to avoid in order to keep from killing anyoneSounds pretty sensible to me, but then again I ve never killed anyone.well, except for food and that doesn t count Uhsorry about that, just kidding..hehhehAnyway, to help John in his quest not to commit heinous butchery, he has developed strict rules that he follows in order to try and be or at least appear normal For example, if someone makes John angry he will compliment them If he finds himself observing someone, even unintentionally, he will make himself avoid that person for one week to avoid stalking them These were very interesting and this part of the book was excellent Now, for those of you that read or watch Dexter, comparisons to that series are both accurate and appropriate Apart from their age, the only significant difference between the characters is that John has not yet killed Apart from that the similarities are certainly there They both have routines they follow to be normal They both work around dead bodies Dexter is a blood splatter analyst while John s family are the local morticians and they both struggle with their inner monster Regardless, I was absolutely loving the book as John like Dexter is a fascinating character and the descriptions of his daily routines and his struggle against his inner monster were very well done In addition to learning about John, the central plot of the book involves the discovery that an actual serial killer is on the loose in John s small town It seems that some madman is killing older men and stealing parts of their body Of course, John is fascinated and begins trying to figure out who the killer is and how he is selecting his victims Okay, let s just pause and take a moment to appreciate how we got to this point because the road is gonna get pretty rough ahead.Ready to continue.Okay, so up to this point, everything about the book was excellent As I finished the first 100 pages my rating was sitting in high 4 star and maybe even 5 star territory and I was just as happy as I could be.AND THENON PAGE 121EVERYTHING CHANGED.BECAUSE.IT HAPPENED and the book completely This was a complete FULL STOP,WTF just happened moment for me that left me stunned and bewildered It was like the infamous end of the movie The Crying Game, except that while that was shocking and excellentthis was just shocking and painful Very, very painful Well, neither I nor the book ever really recovered from IT IT kinda took the wind out of my sails Now the rest of the book was not horrible and there were some interesting portions in the rest of the book Unfortunately, after IT I was basically disengaged from the narrative I just felt.empty So, overall the book was good but it could have been great if IT had not happened Unfortunately, IT did happen and when IT happened, IT kinda ruined it for me Oh well shIT happens P.S For those of you who have requested to know what IT is, here you go view spoiler The serial killer loose in the town turns out to be a DEMON which comes completely out of left field since the book was reading like a straight YA crime thriller hide spoiler


  3. says:

    Quite possibly the best book ever written.


  4. says:

    John Wayne Cleaver lives in a mortuary But before you go thinking this is all fun and games like My Girl well, at least before Thomas J and the bees , you should know that John Wayne is a killer Well, at least he thinks he is As a teenager, his internal monster makes life considerably harder, especially because John feels no connection to his peers and little to no emotion I Am Not A Serial Killer follows John as he deals with having a serial killer in his town Will being so close to an actual killer cause John to lose control of his own monster At times, Dan Wells debut novel seems a bit too juvenile Anyone who knows my reading habits knows how much young adult literature I read My expectations of this work were that I was going to be reading Dexter Lite In actuality, this book had very little gore and it read like someone did research on serial killers, found out about the Macdonald Triad and then just wrote a book about it I don t meant that to sound harsh but I honestly feel that it could ve been so much better John is in high school but it felt like a middle reader book as much as a book about serial killers can In terms of the storyline, I was trucking along until page 103, when a total WTF moment pops up Without spoilers, I ll just say that I thought I was reading a book about a serial killer in reality Turns out, I was reading a book with a supernatural paranormal element Major buzzkill There were just too many no way type moments for me in this story the one that kept popping up much to my dismay was the fact that John simultaneously shovels snow several times a week yet also bikes everywhere even to a lake outside town If there is enough snow to be shoveling than once a week, you are not bicycling Especially in a small town where there is less traffic to melt the snow on the roads Yes, I know it is possible and some people enjoy biking in winter but I don t buy it here note More no way moments below but with spoilers There are tons of glowing reviews for this book on Goodreads, so maybe it is just me And that s great But this book is the first in a series of three I will definitely not be reading any further I see that a few of my friends on here gave up on this one and to them I say Cheers on a choice well made And to Linda, whom I still trust for recommendations, I was excited to read this one You were right to recommend it But I need blood and guts in my killer novels SPOILER ALERT Also, and this is a huge also, if a freaking demon has been killing people for decades, I m pretty sure he d catch on to a high school kid who keeps leaving notes for him Someone that is used to stalking prey will not just go on with every day life la la la while someone is trying to expose them Are you kidding me They d spy back and figure out who it is A large part of me thinks the paranormal element might ve been added in because the book is YA and, for some reason, either the publisher or the author felt like it would be too gruesome to have a regular human doing all the killing and body part snatching To them, I say, yeah right Have you read YA these days Bring on the regular serial killers


  5. says:

    Audio 5 starsStory 5 stars This really needs to be a Netflix series


  6. says:

    Ever since Hannibal Lector flirted with Clarice Starling by telling her about his favorite recipes, it seems like every other thriller features some kind of deranged but brilliant serial killer It s gotten beyond boring, but occasionally some writer will manage to come up with a fresh perspective on the genre Jeff Lindsay s Dexter series put a unique twist on the notion of the serial killer Or at least he did until he wrote the utterly crappy Dexter in the Dark Now Dan Wells is taking a new approach to the concept.John Wayne Cleaver is a teen age boy who lives with his mother at the funeral home she runs with her twin sister John has had a history of bed wetting, killing small animals and starting fires, and he s very fond of helping prepare the dead bodies for funerals He s also obsessed with serial killers, and his reading about them has made him realize that he s already showing all the classic signs of becoming one.John sets strict rules for himself to keep from becoming a killer, but he s still considered an outcast and a freak by his classmates He also has to see a therapist who he tells about his efforts to not engage in mass murder However, when a string of grisly murders occur that terrify the town, John can barely contain his excitement that a serial killer is operating nearby However, John will find out that this killer is worse than even his deranged mind can imagine.The first third of his book had me completely intrigued I loved the notion of someone fighting against their own inclinations John has so fully accepted the idea that he is a serial killer, that he never stops to question why he d work so hard to avoid becoming one if he truly is a sociopath However, the book takes a wild turn that I didn t really enjoy Plus, I could never get entirely over the similarities to the Dexter series It s a quick read and the first in a planned trilogy It was good enough I ll check out the second volume, but I was far interested in John s psychology than the plot.


  7. says:

    I wanted to read this book because of my fascination with serial killers and the intriguing slant in the main character s relationship with himself.While reading, I was put off by Wells writing style It came off as juvenile in that he writes as though he doesn t trust his readers to figure out fairly obvious things for themselves He posts many unnecessary rhetorical questions that the reader is hopefully, or rather should be already wondering about on her own It s muddled in redundancy.All of this I could have put aside, and tried to, for the sake of the still intriguing concept and somewhat likable main character However, a few than 100 pages in, it took an unforgivable turn for the worse I don t want to spoil anything for those who haven t read it yet and may still want to, so I will spare you any sort of real detail Suffice it to say that it became very obvious fairly quickly that this book wasn t one I would care for in the slightest I put it down without finishing it, which is something I usually have a hard time doing, but it was fairly easy with this one.


  8. says:

    No soy un serial killer fue para m un gran descubrimiento, definitivamente es de aquellos libros por los que no daba mucho, pero me termin sorprendiendo de una manera positiva Me gust la forma en la que la historia est narrada, al ser del g nero young adult yo esperaba un tono mucho m s light que el que me encontr Los cr menes en esta novela est n perfectamente construidos y detallados, como para revolverle las tripas a quienes est n dispuestos a adentrarse en los avernos de un adolescente obsesionado con los asesinos seriales, y que alimenta su morbo ayudando a embalsamar cuerpos en la empresa f nebre que lleva su madre El hecho de toparme con t rminos m dicos en los procedimientos de embalsamamiento hace que la descripci n de los sucesos sea m s puntual, y por lo tanto, m s gr fica y expl cita, y puedo asegurar que logr impresionarme bastante view spoiler Otra cosa que me gust mucho fue el giro paranormal que tom la trama Estaba convencida de que iba a ser un thriller sin demasiadas vueltas, pero el tema del asesino sin duda me dej satisfecha e hizo que el libro tomara m s la estructura de un libro de terror hide spoiler


  9. says:

    You are evil, said myself You are Mr Monster You are nothing You are me. Well well wellwhat an odd slice of fun this was Simplistic and understated, this book really doesn t try to be anything other than what it says it is, making for not only a fun, easy read, but a very touching one, as well It s not easy to read about a diagnosed sociopathwell, at least not for the average person For me It felt authentic and real I became entwined and engrossed with this character in the early stages of the book, making it enjoyable from page one all the way until the end And then there s that damn middle part that justughit was soah, fuck it It made me laugh Hard So you have coincidental links to two serial killers, he said That s a little odd, I admit, but I m still not seeing a cosmic conspiracy against you My last name is Cleaver, I said How many people do you know who are named after two serial killers and a murder weapon I mean seriously He really went there You ve got to be kidding me And yet.is it odd that, in the end, I kind of loved where this went I can now see why some people didn t like the direction this novel took, but I actually, after my initial shock, LOVED IT It took a bit, I ll admit, to get past the absurdity with which this was presented But let me ask you this For me, being the type of reader that I am, why wouldn t I love the fact that this little twist made it all the perilous Yeah, it was totally unbelievable Yeah, it was an odd direction to go And, yes, it will not be for everyone But, for whatever reason, I decided I really liked it Logic be damned I think that fire is alive than we are brighter, hotter, sure of itself and where it wants to go Fire doesn t settle fire doesn t tolerate fire doesn t get by Fire does.Fire is I really did have an internal struggle on whether or not I liked what was happening in this one I wrestled with the idea that, while I am in love with these types of books, this was really dumb But it comes down to than that, it comes down to if the positive outweighs the negativeand, for me, it did And that big positive that made this whole book worth it Our main character, John People scurry around, doing their little jobs and raising their little families and shouting their meaningless emotions to the world, and all the while you just watch from the sidelines, bewildered This drives some sociopaths to feel superior, as if the whole of humanity were simply animals to be hunted or put down others feel a hot, jealous rage, desperate to have what they cannot I simply felt alone, one leaf sitting miles away from a giant, communal pile Emotionless, lacking empathy, and a social outcast, John was my favorite type of character, at the moment Well, I like a little empathy in my boys, but, hey You get what I mean Not without the quirky inner monologue or the twisted humor of the writing would this book have succeeded of that I m sure John would not be a likable character to read about had we not gotten his odd rationalizations of the goings on around him or the way he views human flaws, such as love and loyalty In a way, he s broken He longs to feel something, anything, if only to be like those around him He can t even cry He gets jealous that others have this ability, and that s why he is so fascinated with serial killers weird sounding, I know But, when you feel like you re on the verge of being one yourself, it only makes sense to latch onto the one connection in this world you are sure is your only link to humanity You re weird, man, said Max, taking another bite of his sandwich That s all there is to say Someday you re going to kill a whole bunch of people probably than ten, because you re such an overachiever and then they re going to have me on TV and ask if I saw this coming, and I m going to say, Hell yes, that guy was seriously screwed up Then I guess I have to kill you first, I said You heard me right He thinks he is destined to be a serial killer And, because of this, he has a set of rules he rigidly follows And it has workeduntil a serial killer comes to town Every day his monster threatens to leak out, to identify with this new murderer sorry, sorry, not murdererSERIAL KILLER in town But when he finds out who is killing, he takes responsibility into his own hands Who better to find a serial killerthan a destined to be serial killer I ve been clinically diagnosed with sociopathy, I said Do you know what that means It means you re a freak, he said It means that you re about as important to me as a cardboard box, I said You re just a thing a piece of garbage that no one s thrown away yet Is that what you want me to say Shut up, said Rob He was still acting tough, but I could see his bluster was starting to fail he didn t know what to say The thing about boxes, I said, is that you can open them up Even though they re completely boring on the outside, there might be something interesting on the inside So while you re saying all of these stupid, boring things, I m imagining what it would be like to cut you open and see what you ve got in there lol, is it deranged I laughed and loved that Stellar, spot on writing, wicked humor, and absolutely gruesome scenes that make you think deeper about life in general.I really liked this book And, after looking at book two ratings and reviews, it seems book two is even darker, grittier, better I cannot wait until I get the time to read book two Because once John s exterior cracked I fell in love with him I can t wait to see how he wrestles with his dark side For of my reviews, please visit


  10. says:

    I think my wife is a serial killer waiting to be unleashed on the world.I had not heard of this novel but ran across a Powell s Books author reading late last month by Dan Wells I read a summary of his recent book and then scheduled appropriately to go and listen to him Jenn went with me and whispered creepy serial killer mass murderer stats in my ear. it was disturbing how much she knew. When Dan asked people to name 5 killers in order to win a t shirt, she stayed quiet and named 14 under her breath no one but the Author could compete with her, naming less than five, 2 of which Wells had used as examples please send the police after her FIRST if i ever drop off the radar after she reads this, my stats will weigh against me DO NOT enter our home, make sure to arrive with witnesses, and be careful if she offers you refreshments, it is a distraction tactic Bring gelato if you plan on surviving..so, the long short of it is that i bought a copy of I AM NOT A SERIAL KILLER Dan Wells scribbled his John Hancock into the cover and i went home. I had some must reads already waiting that needed to be pushed through my brain machine before i could get to this. How i waited nearly a month, i really do not know it was very, very good John Wayne Cleaver is a 15 year old boy in a small town Overall he is a nice kid who just can t find any connection to the people around him he has only one friend and is a freak among his peers He grew up in a family of morticians He helps out around the house and business John is an outcast because he firmly believes he will grow up to be a serial killer.John does not WANT to be a serial killer, but he thinks that the universe has stacked the deck against him, starting with his name His namesake is an actor who shares a name with a killer c mon pilgrim His father is Sam Cleaver, making him the Son of Sam His last name is a tool for cutting meat.Interestingly enough, the town John lives in has a new killer hanging around, killing people and leaving their bodies lying about with parts missing John obsessively investigates the killer, attempting to determine his motives and methodologies This is in part because of his interest in the subject matter, and in part because of his fear of joining the ranks. the he knows, the better prepared he will be.This really was a great book IANASK is a mild thriller, and a must read for anyone who has found themselves spending an afternoon reading through the Internet Crime Library or whiling away nights watching true crime shows on TV Wells did a great job breaking down the mind of a killer and really leaves you mentally cheering for the 15 year old sociopath that is the main character You know he could turn out to be a horrible person in a couple years, but hope for the best because really, his is just a great kid classically misunderstood.The book is portioned well, focusing on John s internal struggle as much as his obsessions with finding and stopping the local killer.It is a little gory in some spots, but not overly so. of course, i could also be desensitized ok, well, just assume that i am desensitized..One of my favorite aspects of John Cleaver is that he has already identified character traits of his that make him fear for his future He has created a series of rules that will help himself suppress these character traits These rules are mandatory to keep himself from crossing over, they keep his darker side in check. ignoring these rules and he threatens to unleash his darkness, self named Mr Monster Examples of his rules To keep stalker qualities subdued, he avoids people for a full week if he finds he is taking too much interest in them too many conversations and he cuts off contact if he finds himself following them home, they get back burner d If he feels like doing bodily harm on someone, he should distract himself by being overly nice and saying nice things about them Thinking and saying nice tings tends to push back the bad you know the classic Think Positive motivational posters He should have one tattooed on the back of his hand He must hand out with Max, another outcast in his grade having max as a friend makes him normal after all, sociopaths do not have friends, so having a friend combats his sociopathy.The book is humorous and intense in all the right places.If you pick this book up, let me know what you thought of the Halloween Dance chapter It cracked me up enough that i read sections aloud to people who were uncomfortable with a large insistent bearded man enthusiastically reading aloud a book titled I am not a serial killer don t get why that would make people feel off but it apparently does surprised that i still have a job considering the number of people who gave me uncomfortable looks on the elevator or in the break room.This was book one in a trilogy, i am very interested to see how the characters in this series turn out Mr Wells, Get to releasing the books. NOW if you need someone to read them in advance, i would gladly volunteer hint hint


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